Contestants
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After General Larry Platt auditioned, Simon Cowell told him, "I don't think this is gonna be the last we hear about you. I have a feeling about you, Larry." Simon couldn't have been more right.
Pants on the Ground has officially gone viral in American Pop Culture:
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Contestant #103519
General Larry Platt may well turn out to be one of the most popular American Idol auditioners of all time. Larry Platt came in and sang his original song Pants on the Ground for the judges:
Pants on the ground, pants on the ground.
Lookin' like a fool with your pants on the ground
with the gold in your mouth, hat turned sideways.
Pants hit the ground.
Call yourself a cool cat, looking like a fool.
Walking downtown with your pants on the ground
Get it up!
Hey! Get your pants off the ground!
. . . and then repeat those lines ad infinitum. Not only was there the song, but Larry had a few dance moves and exercises that went along with the song, too.
After he stopped singing, Larry informed Simon that he was 62 years old and Simon noted that he was a bit over the age limit of 28.
Once Larry had that news, Randy said, "And we learned something today, Larry. You know what we learned? "Pants on the ground, pants on the ground," and then Larry started singing again.
In case you were wondering, the buttons on the right side of Larry's shirt said "Justice for Troy Davis". I couldn't make out the other button.
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Alexis Cohen was tragically killed early Saturday morning (July 25, 2009) when she was struck by a car in a hit-and-run incident. Daniel Bark has been charged with aggravated manslaughter and drunken driving.
Alexis Cohen (a.k.a. "Glitter Girl") twice appeared on American Idol. In season 7, Alexis first appeared. Outside the audition room, Alexis ranted for a while, spewing a string of profanities combined with multiple confused cliches and mixed metaphors. In season 8, Alexis reappeared with a new attitude, promising that she would behave. After her audition, she ended up giving the judges the double-finger before leaving.
Alexis was a great Idle Idol. Even while ranting and raving, she seemed to be upbeat about the whole thing. She was working on stand-up comedy and had even posted a MySpace video just the day before her death. If you are not allergic to adult language, you can watch the Alexis Cohen MySpace video.
Thanks, Alexis, for the fun times in both seasons.
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In Hollywood, we first flashed back to Nick's original audition, along with additional footage of him throwing his Norman Gentle costume in the garbage.
Nonetheless, we see his Norman Gentle character take the stage in that same costume, red sweatbands and all. As he took the stage, he introduced himself with, "All right, time for some honesty. I'm here to have some fun. I'm Norman Gentle. I am 27 years old. I'm from Stratton, Vermont and I am gonna rock it." Norman then pulled out a pitch pipe and played it off-key.
Norman then broke into Jennifer Hudson's And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going, except he changed the lyrics to sing about himself and he gave a shout-out to the balcony and to Seacrest to sing along:
I'm the best man you'll ever know
there's no way I could ever, ever go
Darling there's no way
no no no no no no no
no way I'm living without you
BALCONY!
I don't want want to be free
SEACREST!
I'm staying. I am
I am staying
And you and you and you and please you
Please won't you love me
Randy started with, "So listen, this is the funny thing about you, man. You are hilarious, dude. You are like banoodles kind of a guy but you know what? You actually can sing. You've got some skills in there, dawg!"
Simon, of course, chimed in by saying that "without the glasses and the silly haircut, [he's] just a boring person" and that when he puts on the costume he's a "joke".
Paula said it would be interesting to hear Nick sing a song "all stripped down". With a guy like Nick, you know you can't get away with a comment like that without a stripping joke. So as Nick started unbuttoning his shirt, Paula quickly said, "No, I don't mean you strip. That's OK. Nick, Norman, Nick, Norman." She also noted that she would like to hear him sing without all the silliness.
We're not sure what Kara had to say about Nick, but it seems that at least Randy and Paula agreed to pass Nick onto the next round because he was accepted!
Offstage, Nick told Ryan that he was going to retire the costume on American Idol, so we'll see what happens.
Nick Mitchell, you've got the combination that Idle Idols has been waiting years for: A quality singing voice with a great, comical act!
Read about Nick "Norman Gentle" Mitchell's original audition.
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News flash: Alexis Cohen was killed in a hit-and-run accident on Saturday, July 25, 2009. For more information, read the article "Alexis Cohen Dies in Accident."
Contestant #94720
Alexis returned to audition a second time. You may remember Alexis Cohen from Season 7, when she flipped us the double-bird and gave one of the best, angriest, and most convoluted post-audition speeches of American Idol history.
Alexis said she came to the New York audition with a whole new attitude: She has replaced the middle fingers with the two-thumbs-up symbol. We also see her meditating and chanting.
Alexis calmly walked into the audition room and informed the judges that she had a new attitude. She sang Madonna's Like a Prayer, but it didn't go well. The judges agreed that she actually sounded worse than her audition last season.
Simon noted that they had fully established that she cannot sing and Alexis politely said, "OK, thank you." Then she said, "I don't know what else to do except give you the finger," and promptly flipped Simon the double-bird yet again. Upon leaving, Alexis said, "Thank you. You're an [BLEEP]."
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Contestant #95437
Nick Mitchell, a.k.a. Norman Gentle, was dressed in a pretty crazy fashion: A bright red headband and matching wristbands, big glasses, a gaudy shirt, and khaki shorts. He ran into the audition room, jumped onto the stage, struck a pose, and shouted, "American Idol!"
Simon said that he didn't want Norman to be funny, but he just wanted Norman to be serious. Norman said, "OK then, it's done" and quickly transformed into Nick by removing the headband, wristbands, and glasses.
Nick sang Jennifer Hudson's And I Am Telling You in a serious manner, but certainly not up to Idol standards. Simon cracked a joke, thereby forcing Nick to revert back into Norman, and consequently kicking off the following banter:
Simon: Norman, you told me you weren't going to make this funny.
Norman: Oh! You hurt me where you get kicked sometimes. That was very hard!
Simon: I'd have thought you'd quite like that.
Norman: You mean the way you like it when Seacrest does it?
[All the judges yell "Whoa!"]
Norman: Whatcha say now, Simon?!?
Simon: That was funny! That was actually funny.
Simon said that Norman was becoming more likable, but that they weren't looking for "a ghastly cabaret comedy singer". Norman got a chair and did his best to belt out Amazing Grace. While he sang, Simon kept warning him not to pull faces, but Norman eventually slipped one in and Simon started yapping about his faces. Norman yelled in a shrill voice, "It's addictive!" and the judges started cracking up.
Paula said she loved him and Kara said it was the first time she had been entertained all day. Norman promised he wouldn't beg and then immediately screamed "[BLEEP] PLEASE!", and fell on the floor, prostrate. Paula gave Norman a "Yes" and Simon immediately retorted with "a categorical 'No'". Kara convinced Randy to give Norman a "Yes", so we'll be seeing him again in Hollywood!
Read about the rest of Norman Gentle's American Idol run.
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Idle Idol Paula Goodspeed was found dead in her car near Paula Abdul's home on Tuesday, November 11. Reports indicate that Goodspeed died of a prescription drug overdose.
During her audition, Paula mentioned that she was a huge fan of Paula Abdul's. People.com reports that Goodspeed had changed her name from Sandra to Paula. Paula had drawn life-size pictures of Paula Abdul. Media outlets have been painting Goodspeed as a stalker, noting that Goodspeed had sent dozens and dozens of letters to Paula, shown up unexpectedly, and sent flowers to Abdul the week before under Abdul's boyfriend's name. Family members have insisted that she was just a big fan and not much more.
Idle Idols appreciates Paula's audition and wishes she had stuck around to share more of herself with the world. Our hearts and prayers go out to Paula's family.
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When Kyle arrived at his hotel room 234, he found two girls already there and unpacked. Taken aback, Kyle began stammering awkwardly. Finally, he decided there must have been a mix-up and wandered away.
On the stage, however, Kyle had more confidence singing Lighthouse Edison's Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes). The judges weren't impressed with his singing, however. While Paula struggled to find kind words to say about Kyle's spirit, Simon said, "I can't listen to this rubbish anymore. I'm gonna say 'No'" and left the room. Needless to say, Kyle wasn't passed through to the next round — yet.
In his second audition, Kyle was passed through to the next round along with Jeffery Lampkin, though we never heard what or how Kyle sang for that audition.
In the next round, Kyle sang Josh Groban's You Raise Me Up. In a rare twist on the usual, Paula was the only judge who offered up criticism, calling it a "safe" audition. Simon even apologized for his antics of leaving the room during his first audition. Kyle was passed through to the final 50 unanimously.
Kyle was one of the last two males to go in front of the judges. Unfortunately, the judges chose Colton Berry over Kyle. Simon had some very positive comments to say to Kyle about his trip:
Kyle, I want you to know — from me — wholeheartedly, I disagree with this decision. I think you had done enough because you were different and unique to have made it through to the next round, and I completely and utterly disagree with this decision. I think you should have been given the chance based on the impact you made at Hollywood to be competing further in this competition. I don't think you're the best singer, but I think you have something which people would have enjoyed, and I'm really disappointed. Really disappointed.
Paula came around the desk and gave Kyle two hugs. Randy told him to stay without and to keep working to become better and more consistent. Simon told Kyle that he was "sorry about it", and that it was nice to meet him. Kyle graciously congratulated Colton on his win.
Read about Kyle's original audition.
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Contestant # unknown
Sarah sang the fast-talking lyrics from Gwen Stefani's The Sweet Escape, however she didn't keep the rhythm of the song and she didn't know all the words, either. Instead of sounding like Gwen Stefani, she sounded more like an excited four year old rambling about something you can't decipher.
Randy asked her, "You ever hear of a guy named William Hung?" Sarah called that the biggest insult ever.
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Contestant #20929
"Hi, my name's Kyle Ensley, and elect me to be your next American Idol."
Kyle is a PolySci and International Business major with aspirations to be the next governor of Oklahoma. Of course, the best springboard to governor is to be American Idol first.
Kyle sang Queen's Somebody to Love in earnest. Simon admitted that Kyle wasn't as bad as he thought he would be and gave him the thumbs up. Before they passed him through, however, Simon made Kyle promise that he wouldn't be like Clay Aiken, doing weird things with his hair, wear red leather jackets, or sing Grease Is the Word.
Forget about Hillary, Rudy, Barack, Mike, and the Johns. I'm voting for Kyle!
Read about Kyle's Hollywood audition.
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News flash: Alexis Cohen was killed in a hit-and-run accident on Saturday, July 25, 2009. For more information, read the article "Alexis Cohen Dies in Accident."
Contestant #83542
Alexis admitted, "I like things that shine. I'm like a pirate." She proved this with her attire: Thick silver glitter over her eyes, multi-color star-shaped earrings, and a shirt with a sparkly design on it.
Alexis' pre-audition plan? "Judges, I plan to knock you on your feet." I'm not quite sure how that works on a literal or a figurative plane.
In the audition, Alexis sang Grace Slick's Somebody To Love. She didn't sing well enough for American Idol, but the judges did suggest that she might do well in a 60s cover band.
Alexis took her defeat fairly well in the audition room, but when she exited, she ranted about Simon and about how "snugly" [sic] he looked at her. Back in the audition room, Simon compared Alexis to Willem Dafoe.
Alexis gave the finger to the camera several times and declared, "I'm going for actressing." At this point, Alexis' mother chimes in for the first time and we get an idea of what parentage might result in a character like Alexis.
And here's how Alexis' final rant down the escalator went:
I'll make it one day. One day, somehow, some way. And I hope that someone sees that I have some talent somewhere whether it be in acting or singing or whether it be the fact that I have the chutzpah and the [censored] to be able to get up and talk — to be able to say what I'm thinking, to be able to say what I mean, to be able to speak the heart, to be able to talk, to be able to lead. I will be victorious, always be victorious, all rising.
'Nuff said.
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