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Contestant #6907
Joshua Moreland goes by the name "Jay Smoove."
Jay Smoove sang his own song, Beautiful Lady. After singing the first two words, he tossed a combination of glitter and rose petals into the air.
In typical fashion, Simon summed it up as a "horribly over-the-top, corny, revolting audition."
After Joshua left the room, an assistant walked to the stage with a broom. Simon quickly jumped up and called Ryan in to have him do the American Idol housework, but Ryan said he wouldn't feel comfortable with not letting her do her job. As Ryan walked out, Simon asked if they were still on camera and took the broom to sweep up and prove that he was the better man. As Simon swept the glitter and rose petals, Randy said he didn't think Simon had ever swept before and Paula pointed out that he didn't even know how to hold the broom properly. Ryan returned and explained that the tool was called a "broom". Once told the cameras weren't rolling, Simon quickly told the assistant that the mess was all hers again.
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Contestant #3032
Alesha has been singing since she was eight years old. She said her sound was unique and that she didn't sound like anyone else, but the judges would eventually disagree with that sentiment.
Alesha sang Celine Dion's Surrender. Her vocal stylings were odd, particularly in the more powerful sections of the song.
Simon cut her off and asked who her vocal coach was. Alesha told him that it was Ron Harris at Talent Boot Camp, and Simon noted that "someone just lost their job." (Little did he know that Ron Harris is one of Christina Aguilera's producers.)
Paula noted that she liked Alesha's voice when she wasn't trying to sing powerfully. Randy mentioned that she had the same tone as Dolly Parton, and Paula wholeheartedly agreed. Alesha didn't know any Dolly Parton songs, so Simon instructed her to learn a Dolly Parton song and come back to sing it when she was comfortable.
Alesha returned to the holding room and watched YouTube videos of Dolly Parton's Islands in the Stream. After rehearsing it for a while, she returned and sang it to the judges. With a Dolly Parton song, Alesha did much better. Simon refrained from voting because it wasn't "his" audition any more. Simon and Paula both passed Alesha through to Hollywood. Simon said, "Welcome to Dollywood."
After Alesha left, Simon said to Paula, "I hate to admit it, you were right. . . . That wasn't the ending that I wanted."
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Contestant #59580
Ashley is the girlfriend and ex-girlfriend of Cory and Chris Lane, respectively.
Ashley immediately stole Simon and Paula's heart when she walked in carrying Panda, a 6 week old Pomeranian puppy.
Ashley sang Kellie Pickler's Red High Heels, but since she had black heels on, she sang it as "black high heels".
Outside the audition room, Cory and Chris admitted that they told her that her voice was up to par so she's try out, but they didn't actually believe she had a chance to make it through.
As it turns out, they were right because Simon called the audition "excruciating."
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Contestants #54304 & #54303
Cory and Chris are identical twins. They came with Cory's girlfriend (and Chris' ex-girlfriend), Ashley Lawing, to audition.
At the audition, Chris beatboxed while Cory rapped about being better than the Brittenum twins:
Yeah, baby.
We comin' for y'all, Brittenums.
The new rivalry. 2007 Idol.
Here's how we gonna do this.
Sit back, please relax.
This is not –
At this point, Cory loses his place in the song and can't find his way back into the song:
– all right, don't –
All right, Brittenums, this is how we gonna do this.
Aight, here we go.
Aight, here we go, let's go.
Here we go.
Aight, here we go, let's go
Finally, Cory gets himself back into the song and picks up at the line he originally missed:
Don't get it wrong 'cuz it ain't our audition.
So sit back, just relax, and please just listen:
The name's Chris and Cory Lane and we look the same.
Kinda like them Brittenum twins, just not as lame
We ain't cocky, we just want you to see
We got that look, got the voice, got that personality.
So I'm gonna cut it short and I'm gonna leave it at this:
If you don't put us through, man, we gonna be really ticked.
Hey!
Simon called their audition "amateurish" and they left without a fight.
Outside the audition room, Ashley admitted she was shocked that they both hadn't made it through to Hollywood.
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Contestant #1069
Tiffany has been "singing ever since church choir" and her pastor told her that her voice is "more maturing." It's quite possible that he's right, but if that's true, I'd hate to have heard her when she was starting out. Tiffany admitted that she is still trying to train up her voice.
Pre-audition, Tiffany did some warm-ups from her vocal lessons for the camera. Her scales sounded more like a bored, tone deaf race car speeding through its gears.
Tiffany sang the gospel song Hallelujah. She sang very loudly and very poorly.
Tiffany told Simon that her voice was a gift from God, and after her audition, Simon asked if there was a return policy.
In the holding room, we see Tiffany singing Loggins & Messina's Run River Run. As she's belting out the song, we hear a voice loudly say "Shh!!!"
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Contestant #43369
Jared sang Henry Purcell’s I’ll Sail Upon a Dog Star in a very high voice — even higher than most girls.
In case you couldn't understand the lyrics he was singing simply because your ears can't hear pitches that high, here is what we hear him singing:
I'll sail upon the Dog Star,
And then pursue the morning,
And then pursue
And then pursue the morning.
I'll climb the frosty mountain,
I'll climb the frosty mountain,
And there I'll coin the weather.
At this point, we hear Simon say, "OK, this is like something out of a science fiction movie."
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Contestant #39283
Chris has a full beard and wore what looked to be a leather kilt. What better to complement this clothing choice than a striped collared shirt and sneakers?
For his audition, Chris sang Indigo Girls' Summertime:
Summertime
And the living is easy
Fish are jumping
The cotton is high
Chris may not look like an American Idol, but at least he had a monotone voice that was sure to carry him all the way to . . . the audition room door.
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Contestant #41506
Eva is a very extroverted woman who always seems to be smiling. Paula complemented Eva on her smile as she entered the audition room.
Eva chose to sing Vanessa Carlton's A Thousand Miles. As she started singing poorly, Eva started dancing around and twirling. After her first twirl, her contestant number sticker fell off and onto the back section of the stage. Eva continued dancing around, and eventually stepped on the sticker, which stuck to the heel of her high heel shoes. On Eva's next step, she suddenly had no traction and slipped to the floor. Luckily, Eva was wearing white stockings so she didn't flash the cameras.
Simon called it out as an act, but Eva vehemently defended herself and said that she was just trying to be energetic and entertain the judges.
After being turned down by the judges, Eva left the audition room, tore up her contestant number sticker, and jumped up and down on it.
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Contestant #
Brooke was the 2007 Miss South Florida Fair and she wanted to prove to Simon that pageant belles can sing.
Regarding the Miss South Florida Fair contest, Brook said, "It was a lot of fun. I would definitely do it again, if I don't do American Idol, which I hope I do do American Idol. I just said 'Doo doo American Idol.'"
Brooke sang The Jackson 5's Who's Loving You and she sang well enough to prove that at least this pageant belle could sing.
Brooke got a unanimous vote through to Hollywood.
As Brooke left screaming with joy, Simon described Brooke as "possibly the most annoying person in the world I have ever seen in my life." He noted that he didn't want her to sing well, but obviously she did well enough to get his vote.
Read about Brooke's Hollywood audition.
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Contestant #47719
J.P. auditioned three years ago and was two places in front of Carrie Underwood in the audition line.
J.P. sang Rascal Flatts's Me and My Gang, but he didn't come through with the star quality he earlier claimed to have.
After some poor feedback, J.P. told the judges he didn't want to spend four years in school as a music major.
Simon told J.P., "My pen has got more charisma.
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Contestant #47503
Josh Jones is a glassworker, but if he makes it to Hollywood, he wouldn't mind throwing his glass cutter as far as he can.
In Josh's audition, he sang Queen's Don't Stop Me Now, but that's exactly what Simon did. Simon was distracted by Josh's eyes as he sang because they would open a bit too wide during parts of the song. Even Paula admitted that he had a good voice but that his eyes were distracting.
After advising him not to do the thing with his eyes, Josh did it again the second time. Randy told Josh to turn away from the judges so they could hear his voice without being distracted by his eyes.
While Josh was singing to the wall, Simon noted, "He can't make it through to the finals if he performs like that every night."
Simon declared that the performance was a bit too "karaoke-y", but Paula and Randy pushed Josh through to the next round.
Outside the audition room, Josh revealed that he had three four-leaf clovers stuck to the back of his contestant number sticker.
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